Why do we worry?

Survival

Our brain is programmed to solve problems. It has a huge ability to anticipate future scenarios and find solutions. While problem-solving is intentional, worrying is more of stories in the mind, which you can’t control rather than action-oriented.

Illusion of Safety

Worrying can make you feel safe. Worry is a false belief that thinking about the worst case will prevent it from happening. This type of thought can reinforce the worry and continue the cycle. It’s almost as though if you don’t worry enough, something terrible will happen, and you were at fault.

Stopping worry

‘Don’t worry’ might not be the best way to end worry.  Instead, notice the difference between ‘worry’ thoughts and the action of worrying. 

Noticing and Greeting thoughts

Worry thoughts pop in and out. It’s the constant chatter of the mind. Noticing these as words, not you can be helpful rather than fighting against it. For instance, you may greet it as hello worry, I notice you’re here. See you again later.

Scheduling worrying

Worrying on the other hand involves active engagement with these thoughts. While it might seem automatic, this is something we do not the other way around. Distracting yourself might give a break before you get back to worrying. This avoidance might feed worry in the long run. Instead, scheduling worry might be more productive. This doesn’t stop your worry but rather redirects it something constructive.

– Set time for a worry appointment at the start or the end of the day for 15 minutes. This can aid in drawing a boundary for your worry.

– Noting it down gives it a concrete form, and you’ll be able to clarify if it’s a problem that needs to be solved.

– Once the timer sets off, it’s time to stop dwelling and get back to the present.

References

Newman, M. G., Jacobson, N. C., Zainal, N. H., Shin, K. E., Szkodny, L. E., & Sliwinski, M. J. (2019). The effects of worry in daily life: An ecological momentary assessment study supporting the tenets of the contrast avoidance model. Clinical Psychological Science, 7(4), 794-810. https://doi.org/10.1177/216770261982701